A wedding is a party. Only a bigger one because of the number of guests one is having (for large weddings) as well as the magnitude and scale of everything involved leading to the day and essentially also the fact that no, you cannot repeat it. While for some couples you will find the priority is for them to get it over and done with, a formality of sorts, perhaps even just for the parents, or because it is what society expects, for other couples, they genuinely see it as a celebration, want their guests to be engaged and have a good time. Granted no one wants their guests to come and get bored, but I have met a few couples whose main goal and intention was to ensure that their highly esteemed guests were fully engaged and genuinely enjoyed their wedding day. Simply put the focus of the wedding was not only for it to be memorable to them as a couple, but also memorable to all their guests as well.
To be able to achieve this, here are a few tips that a couple needs to consider:
- Select your MC carefully-I can’t say this enough. We have all attended one of those weddings where you have an MC who does not read the room. Such an MC will not know when to start or stop with the jokes, the dancing, games etc. A good MC will know how to ensure that all the guests at your wedding function are well engaged. He will know how to integrate both the young and the old in different activities and also know how to captivate the attention of the guests so that small ‘’kamkunji’s’’ do not come up during the wedding. He also knows how to ensure a right balance of time for all program activities so that there is neither too much, nor too little of one activity at any one time.
- Be on time- Ensuring your program runs on time as per your communication to your guests is key. Starting from the church ceremony right down to the cake cutting. Do your best to ensure your program runs on time. Your wedding running on time means that no aspect of your wedding is rushed and guests can comfortably enjoy being there. Having guests constantly look at the clock because the church has gone way over time and they are hungry or the speeches took too long before the cake cutting is a sure way to have guests disengage. Avoid this by doing your best to stick to your program. Your MC should also be able to help you with this. See my previous post on time here.
- Cut down on your photo session time- This is closely related to the second point. Disappearing from your guests for hours in the name of photo session is unacceptable. A good photo session time should take roughly about 40 minutes and this is for a large bridal team. Thereafter make your way quickly back to the wedding. This is another reason why you should choose a photo session location that is close to the wedding reception (or even at the same location) so that you cut down on travel time back to the reception. You are the hosts of your wedding and therefore long absences should be avoided. Having a good photographer will save you time here as they can help schedule a shoot that is short but sweet and will not keep you from your guests.
- Be deliberate about your entertainment – Select a good DJ who like the MC will be able to read the room. A good DJ is one who understands the dynamics of the demographics of the guests knowing full well that both the young and old are in attendance and therefore works to incorporate music that speaks to both groups. Playing only the latest hits at a wedding is a complete no-no and should be avoided at all costs because this essentially locks out one demographic of your guests. Having a good music selection with different genres as well will ensure your guests stay on their toes at different times throughout which means your dance floor is never empty. Better still if you get a DJ who can ensure they get all your guests on the dance floor at the same time, you will have scored! The point here is to not leave this aspect to chance and ensure that you have this discussion with your entertainment provider.
- Regulate your speeches– No, not everyone needs to speak regardless of the impact they have had in your life since childhood and for those who do, they need to keep it short, sweet and relevant. Have this discussion with your MC, communicate the same to your selected few. This is important. Having a timeframe for speeches/ each speaker ensures that this part of your program does not get out of hand and therefore run into subsequent planned sessions. When the speeches are too long, your guests’ loose interest and this causes them to disengage. It is also important to be deliberate about who speaks at your wedding.
- Serve a good selection of food- Its true. No one remembers what the bridesmaids were wearing but they will definitely remember the food that was served. No matter your budget, food is definitely an important aspect of your wedding. Food brings people together and helps people to bond. So not only should you be concerned about what is being served but also how it is served and when it is served. If your budget allows, expanding your meal selection is a great way to keep guests involved and engaged. You can space your servings and have for example fruits, tea, uji, mandazi’s even ice-cream after the main meal so guests are constantly having something to look forward to. Serving everything at once means that your guests have a short time to eat everything including desert and then sit idle thereafter and wait for the next item on the program. Just like you do in your home, surprising your guests with meal after meal is sure to keep them fully engaged and ready to get involved in all activities thereafter. Discuss this with your chef.
- Incorporating a cocktail session– A cocktail session occurs immediately after the church ceremony ends and just before the reception begins where lunch is served. During this time guests will locate each other, mingle, exchange pleasantries and niceties. This creates engagement because guests do not just rush to their tables and sit waiting for lunch or rush to the queue for lunch, but instead they connect with each other and spread good vibes all around. At this point, a good selection of music can also be playing such as classical music or jazz to assist the guests in getting into the mood and prepare for lunch. A cocktail session also buys additional time for the bridal team as the guests are engaged before the main meal is served and therefore can give them some more photo shoot time.
These are some of my ideas on having your guests engaged throughout your wedding ceremony. I am sure there are many more though. Drop them in the comments section below.
Xoxo.
Laura